Harsh reality week in the NFL
Separation week in college
Set, hut!

Your Magic City Dirty Birds
Baked a cake for President Carter
But layed an egg at the end of the game.
Tyler Eifert just couldnt catch a break.
Oh, wait, ya he did.

Your Midtown Bumblebees steamrolled some team from up North.
372 rushing yards.
It may not be pretty,
But there is a certain poetry
To a well run option
Just like there's a certain poetry
To The Football Minute.

There must've been something in the water
This weekend,
Because your Auburn Avenue Panthers
Racked up over 300 yards in rushing themselves.
Welcome back, Panthers!
Now go take that Southern Fried Conference you're in.

Your number two Athens County Boodawgs
Chopped enough wood
To send Rocky Top back to the Smokies
With their Vols between their legs

The Cleveland Browns scored a bunch of points
But gave up a bunch of points
And let the refs elbow them out of a win.

Mark Arum's New York Football Giants
Lost what should've been a shootout
But kinda was a fizzle out.

Fitzmagic finally turned Fitztragic
And The Bearded Wonder
Gave his job back
Until the next time Jameis calls Uber.

The New York Red Bulls dropped a cherry bomb
On your Atlanta United FC
And now United leads the east
By just one point.

Earl Thomas of the Seabirds
Broke his leg and flipped a bird to his team
As he was carted off on the meat wagon

And tonight, everyone's favorite fantasy QB
Takes on nobody's favorite fantasy QB
On the MNF