Your Jacksonville Boodawgs had a cocktail party and got their hors dervvs chomped on by the Swampland Crocodiles.
Your English Avenue Wreckers tried to blow another fourth quarter lead but managed to stave off Coach K's parking lot attendants.
Your Northside Drive Dirty Birds were finally on the pitching end of a tight fitting shootout.
The Climzone Tigros are a squeek squeek squeeking through the season as they barely avoided JimboNoles flaming spears. Damn those refs!
Your Downtown Panthers lost to South Alabama. That's almost not worth mentioning.
The Lower Peninsula Khakipants ruined the Sparty Party in the battle of the worst state in America bowl.
The Kentucky Bengals and the D.C. Native Americans played in London. The only thing worse than an NFL game in London is a TIED NFL game in London.
IT'S NOT SOCCER, PEOPLE! THERE ARE NO TIES IN AMERICA!
Kerrolahna cockadoodle dooed Rocky Top's last chance at being a contender this year.
And now the corn won't grow at all on Rocky Top, the dirt is now too rocky by far.
Don't go to sleep on War Eagle. They're quietly on a 5 game winning steak. And Ole Miss is looking like Old Swiss Miss right about now.
The college football playoff rankings came out today and whoppety damn doo dah!
And just in case you missed it. We will have Game 7 of the World Series tomorrow night!